Clarity in Conversations.

Clarity in Leadership: The Cost of Avoidance and the Power of Personal Responsibility

There are moments in life that linger long after they pass, etched into memory with startling clarity. One of those moments for me was a December afternoon in San Francisco in 2011. It was a time when the city was still a pristine and cosmopolitan jewel, and I was living there with my daughter and youngest child while my sons were away at university. The city’s holiday spirit was in full bloom, with festive decorations adorning the streets. I was having lunch at McCormick & Kuleto's with friends, both old and new, when a conversation unfolded that has stayed with me ever since.

Among our group was a woman I had not met before, serving as the Interim CFO for one of the most prestigious nonprofits in the United States. She was educated, composed, and confident, yet visibly shaken. She had just come from a board meeting that could only be described as disastrous.

The organization she had been with for just eight weeks had revealed an unavoidable and immediate reduction in force (RIF) that would impact half of their domestic and global staff. The alternative was even grimmer—missing payroll and tapping into emergency funds that would have “catastrophic” consequences, especially for a well-heeled board more accustomed to managing influence than crises. As if that weren’t enough, another 10% of the staff would face layoffs within 60 days.

Her frustration was palpable, bordering on rage—not at the necessity of the layoffs but at the sheer negligence that made them inevitable. The financial issues she was now tasked with solving were not new. They had been simmering post-recession, ignored by leadership that refused to course-correct, modify spending, or seek emergency benefactors in time. Severance packages? Gone. Extensions of health benefits? Out of the question. Previous commitments for tuition reimbursement? Unceremoniously canceled. By the time the truth was disclosed, options were reduced to selling furniture and office art to stave off the inevitable.

“If they had faced the truth earlier,” she said with a mix of anger and disbelief, “they could have done a 10% RIF with six months' severance and pursued other fundraising avenues. But they waited too long. They ignored too much.”

Her story is a powerful reminder of the cost of avoidance in leadership. The refusal to acknowledge hard truths doesn’t make them less true—it just makes the consequences more severe when reality finally asserts itself. In this case, the board’s unwillingness to face financial realities led to deeper layoffs, shattered morale, and a loss of faith from those who remained.

Leadership, especially in uncertain times, demands clarity and personal responsibility. It demands the courage to confront inconvenient truths head-on, to make hard decisions while options are still on the table. More than that, it demands transparency and honesty—not only for the sake of the organization but for the people who depend on it.

That woman was moved to the New York office shortly after the New Year, and though we haven’t spoken much since, her story has been a constant reminder. Her anger was not just about the numbers; it was about the betrayal of trust, the denial of reality, and the refusal of those in charge to take responsibility when it mattered most.

Clarity in leadership is not about having all the answers. It’s about being honest about the questions. It’s about addressing problems early, even when it’s uncomfortable, and making decisions based on reality rather than wishful thinking. This kind of clarity—rooted in personal responsibility—is what separates leaders who endure from those who falter.

For all of us in leadership roles, or any role professionally or as a human being, her story is a call to action: Face the facts early. Take responsibility before it’s forced upon you. And above all, remember that clarity isn’t just about seeing the path forward—it’s about having the courage to walk it.